Diving

Content-warning: anxiety

You come from work, a busy city filled with noise and anxiety. To not overwhelm yourself, you put your headset on and you dive.

You swiftly slide under the half-broken door of the subway entrance as the rain hammers down in your ears. This continus fall has been surprisingly hard for a january, strong enough for you to not use your headset out of fear of it breaking. The pressure in your ears leave you dizzy as you try to reorient yourself, this sudden change of lightning and atmosphere blowing in your eyes.

"Still got a few minutes left, I guess. I hope the usual clowns won't be slowing everything down yet again..."

"No one in sight...", you say to yourself with a breath of relief, as you continue to run towards the gates. You grip the handles and dart over, trying to pass as smoothly as possible in passerby's eyes, "... I don't have time for this bullshit".

You notice most doors being packed with people desperately trying to stack themselves into the small frame, and choose to go all the way down to the first car, usually much less filled than the other cars for some reason you choose to put aside.

A light jump later, you land inside, taking a minute to settle down.

The pressure here is overwhelming. The sound of rain is foggy, mostly masked by the heavy underground tunnel structure you currently walk under, but this absence means that you are now much more vulnerable to the sound of life around you.

A child's cry, a group of teenagers laughing, an obnoxious old person talking loudly to their phone, "I don't need to know everything about your business trip, Dave...", you think to yourself, throwing daggers at this stranger with your eyes, "... thanks for making the rides as uncomfortable as possible, dumbass".

You fiddle around in your backpack, desperately trying to find your headset, the crown making this day-to-day travel bearable.

"Gods damned, I'm sure I had it in front of the textbooks, don't tell me I forgot it on my desk again."

The combination of the ambient pressure and the stress of not finding one of the only belongings that feel important to you rising, you struggle to search efficiently and panic some more, before you manage to feel it under your hand.

"Finally."

You take a few seconds to breathe again, before sliding it over your ears. A quick pressure of the button, the sudden noise removal makes the pressure completely drop, allowing you to drift. You pick that album Mistress recommended, and settle on your seat, before diving into the music.

You close your eyes, letting a sigh of relief, before slowly dozing off away to the rythm of the music, slowly fiddling with the ring of your collar.

You are going home.